
The Opening Tip
Hello & Happy Almost Weekend - It's the Corner Three!
SPIKE'S CORNER... READY TO BE HURT
New to the Corner Three Newsletter: every week Spike or Mike will write a section, aptly titled Spike's Corner or Mike's Corner. It's Spike's turn today, and he's writing about NBA chaos, being a regular season bitch, and maybe not being doomed.
The line between playoff motherfucker and regular season bitch has never been so drastic.
The Bucks were the #1 seed, and just lost in five games to the Jimmy Butler-led (who I’ve always believed in) Miami Heat. The Cavs just lost in five games to the Knicks. The Celtics are being pushed to the bring by the .500 Hawks.
(Shout out JJ Redick, who nestled his MVP vote for the ‘best player on the best team who scored the most points per minute’ but unfortunately lost in the first round to the #8 seed and shot 10-23 from the free throw line.)
Over in the West, the Warriors, a #6 seed who were 11-30 on the road, are probably the favorites to go to the Finals. The Suns, who played a total of 10 games together in the regular season, are favored to win the series over the Nuggets, who were the #1 seed in the conference. And oh by the way, the Lakers, who were in the play-in tournament, look like they’re going to take down the Grizzlies.
It remains to be seen what the Sixers are. We’re currently in that “enough down time to forget all the bad stuff and remember all the good stuff” part of our relationship with the team where we talk ourselves into this finally being the year. It’s a nice part of the relationship, to be honest. We get to imagine them as their best selves, and they don’t have the opportunity to let us down.
(This is like when you have a break-up, and 14 months later you’re sitting alone at home thinking about the good times. You look at your phone and maybe shoot a pathetic text to the ex, and even agree to meet up for a drink. Most times within 8 minutes of seeing her/him, you remember why you broke up in the first place. Shout out [redacted] from many, many years ago.)
One of the funniest little factoids about this particular dreamland state that we’re in is that “we have the coaching advantage over the Celtics” is something I’ve heard several times. We have spent no less than 88% of the last two years insisting that Doc Rivers get fired, but today, he is our hero. Sure, it'd be a great story. Fuck Joe Mazzulla! George Hill looking motherfucker. I bet he's not even good at golf!
I’ve said that I believe that the Sixers will lose to the Celtics (if they do, in fact, play the Celtics). I do. I’m not going to lie to you and say that I think anything other than what I think. But I’m also being honest when I tell you I’ve never been less sure what I think will happen in any playoff round. I have no fuckin’ idea! I am sure of a lot of things, but I’m really unsure of this one. Maybe James Harden will wake up, Maxey will go nuclear and Joel's knee is actually mostly fine.
I feel like I’m less informed than ever, because what we’ve watched for the last six months seems to matter less than ever. And the Celtics are good, absolutely, but it’s not like they’re the 1996 Bulls. They also haven’t even advanced yet.
(I do know that your primary offensive option in the NBA should be able to shoot a free throw. Shout out Giannis.)
I’m not in the dreamland state you might be. I’m actually jealous of you in that respect. But I don’t feel doomed. So that’s a start, maybe?
Oh Yeah, The Sixers

SWEEEEP And The Living Is Easy (Kinda)
Get Well very soon big fella, for now though, fuck Brooklyn, Ben Simmons and Nic Claxton.
This Week's Top 10
10. Playoff Doc
9. Playoff Sam Cassell
8. Playoff Melton
7. Playoff McDaniels
6. Playoff Niang
5. Playoff Harden
4. Playoff Mad Max
3. Playoff Jo
2. Playoff Bball Paul
1. Playoff Tobias
Best Thing I ate this week
The Cereal Killa milkshake from Craftsman Row. Probably won't be able to eat anything else after but if you dare, their burgers and appetizers are ridiculous

Peace, Love and Process
Check on your friends, rest easy till Monday night.

-Zo